The personal growth industry is a lucrative market that includes self-help books, seminars, courses, and coaching. Critics argue that this commercialization may lead to exploitation, where individuals spend significant amounts of money on products and services promising personal transformation but yielding limited results.

Were you ever in this trap? Not feeling positive enough? Not getting the expected results? All your questions unanswered through hundreds of courses, books, and coaching hours you went through.

These are pretty common problems and questions, especially for managers. The commercial personal growth movement can sometimes overemphasize positivity and the relentless pursuit of happiness. This focus on unbridled optimism may ignore the complexities of human emotions and struggles. It might make you focus only on efficiency and effectiveness. It might make you drop the depth of human experience once called life. In some extreme cases, might reduce you to an assessment whether you are productive or not. Or simply put, whether you are capable of making money or not. If you can’t—buy another book.

It is a vicious cycle I’ve been in, and the first thing I learned, is to accept a big part of it is just the reality of the system we live in. The way we built the world to sustain its growing population numbering billions. Through putting everything into commercial mould. I could have stopped there. I didn’t.

What I did was to start following and building my own way. As a smart woman once told me—’we are sent down here to create, not to replicate’. Some of my own methods might be controversial, at the same time, I have decided they are healthier for me. Thanks to that, I learned there are some problems I can’t solve. Also, that it’s OK to complain, and that I can disagree with something, but still execute on it, if it moves me in the right direction. That I can get angry and be imperfect.

And hell—cancelling some of my 1:1s last minute, is not the end of the world!

I also started to believe that what most bestselling books and courses offer is what we would like to hear (averaged, politicked and oversimplified), not what would teach us something new. They describe how to solve problems and give answers, not how to learn from unknowns. Not how to create. Well most anyway.

I wouldn’t just blanket-critique every single commercially available development and growth resource. And I can’t be a hypocrite. I did pay for a lot of it, to learn and extend to where my position is today. I still believe it is a valuable lesson for everyone to take. Likewise, I will most likely still probably pay for more and attend them in the future. Should I decide, they move me where I want to be.

The one lesson, though, I wanted to share through all of it is—it is worthwhile to avoid trying to buy answers. I learned that someone else creating answers for you is rather unlikely. This is for your individual being, mission and purpose. Only you can create them, based on your experience. And based on where life will take you (which I count among the things we can’t control; there are many of them; it’s also OK). So is there a “perfect” way for everyone?

“Perfect” personal development is subjective and varies from person to person because it depends on an individual’s unique goals, values, and circumstances. The personal development journey begins with deep self-awareness. Self-awareness is the foundation upon which personal growth is built. You should also include developing resilience, so you can face challenges and setbacks with determination and a positive attitude. Taking care of your physical and mental health is crucial. And there are many more … things you can’t buy.

Happy exploring … and creating.

Oh, ops. Given, we went on a bit of a tangent—regarding my question in the title. As with every big question, the answer is both yes and no. 😉